Really Caring

I Do Not Care How Much You Care.

Good Morning,

Proverbs 2:1 “My son, if thou wilt receive my words, and hide my commandments with thee;”

vs. 2 “So that thou incline thine ear unto wisdom, and apply thine heart to understanding;”

vs. 3 “Yea, if thou criest after knowledge, and liftest up thy voice for understanding;”

If a young person is involved a relationship in which they “really care” about someone, should the parent give in (even if they have reservations about the relationship or do not approve)?  Does “really caring” change right and wrong?  

Let me change the pieces in the game and see if “really caring” still matters.  An adult man “really cares” for a young boy, or a couple of married people “really care” about others outside their marriage, is the relationship okay? Does “really caring” make the decision right?  

I listened as a beautiful twenty year-old college student told how she “really cared” for a fifty year-old man.  Jumping ahead in the story: a marriage took place (I did not marry them), and later a divorce followed.  No, “really caring” does not change logic or reason.  “Really caring” has very little to do with making wise decisions, in fact, in my life, preferring biblical advise over what I felt usually brought me into the best choices and wisest decisions.

Samson “really wanted” that girl and insisted that his parents get her for him.  (We know how that turned out.)  Some folks really believed there were weapons of mass distraction in Iraq. Hitler really thought he could rule the world. 

“But I love him/her” is a similar statement made by those about to make stupid choices. Wisdom will not allow feelings to make decisions.  Prudence searches out information that leads to logical and fact-based choices. 

The first girl I “really liked”  was a redhead named Tammy; I was 5 years old. I am glad we did not get married.  The next gal I liked was my first grade teacher.  Again, it would not have worked out had I allowed my feelings rule.  Folks will say that those situations are different, but I disagree.  Decisions based upon feelings are usually wrong, unless you feel like eating ice cream – that is probably okay.

There is a reason I never allowed my children to keep coming back and asking for something; nor could they go from one parent to the other trying to obtain the desired answer.  

As a pastor, if you desire my advice, you are welcome to come ask.  If you do not ask, that is your business; I will probably never mention the decision.  But if you ask, and then come later and ask again, and come later and ask again, here is what you are saying: “I think you were wrong with your first answer, Pastor. Now that you have had time to think, have you come around to the right answer (their answer?)”  If you ask again and again, you are not asking for anything but for the approval of your own opinions.  

Does anyone remember a guy in the Old Testament who kept going back to God asking for the same thing?  (Balaam)  He received his reluctant answer.

I do not care how much you care.  I care about what will work, what is logical, and what follows biblical principles.  Consider the feelings of a person on the Weight Watchers program looking at the ice cream counter: to follow feelings and pursue what you “really want” is unwise. 

I do believe that fasting and prayer can touch and even change the mind of God, but it is a dangerous road to travel – one I avoid.  I like the simple statement of Christ, “Not my will, but thine Lord.” 

Pastor